So Anxious

"Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action." - Walter Anderson

Anxiety is defined as Intense, excessive, and persistent worry and fear about everyday situations. It can present itself in many different ways like sweating, an elevated heart rate, digestive issues, and more. There are also different kinds of anxiety. When I use to hear about someone experiencing anxiety, I simply thought it was them experiencing nervousness. I thought this way until I began having my own experiences.

When I went off to college some years ago, I saw this moment as a time to move away from an environment that I was comfortable in, to start a new journey. Little did I know, it would truly open my eyes to a part of myself that I never knew..... the anxious side. The excitement I had when moving into my college dorm slowly turned into worry. As much as I loved meeting new people, anxiety crippled me and made it harder to do so. A lot of times, you may hear people speak about how nervous they are to go on a stage and perform or speak right? Well, when it comes to anxiety, the world is my stage and the people in it are the audience. This is how I viewed everyday to the point where I refrained from doing a lot while in college. To give more of an insight, I wasn't eating regularly because I was too worried about walking into the common eating area and simply being seen. While people gained that freshman 15 during their first year, I was the opposite. Don't get me wrong, I loved my college experience and would do it all over again, but I learned that you never truly know who you are until you leave your sheltered space to embark on your own journey.

Anxiety can be the door that you try to walk through but can't because you are thinking of the worst behind that door. There is so much waiting for you on the other side of that door, but those thoughts get a hold of you and make you think the worst case scenario for almost anything. People often seem surprised when I speak on the hurtles I face with anxiety because of how I may come off in social settings. The key is to act on those thoughts before they get of hold you. To be honest, I give myself a little pep talk before going out. "Bernice, you're going to have a good time, just be yourself and enjoy !" Your desire to be comfortable in your own skin should be higher than the anxious thoughts that try to invade your mind. Finding different outlets to release your thoughts whether it's through therapy, journaling, physical activity, etc; these things can help you move in the right direction. One of the major keys to your grwoth is understanding that you must DO. When you allow yourself to sit in your thoughts, you will submerge yourself in them and begin to feel like you have no way out but to hide.

You are more than your anxious thoughts. Life is too beautiful to stay in the corner of your mind. Start teaching yourself how to live in the now and release the past and pray about your future. You were created to live a life of purpose, not one of fear.

Song of the week: Psalm 42 by Tori Kelly