Count on Me

“Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you; spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life.” — Amy Poehler

Since grade school, we're taught to make friends with others and we're shown how important friendships are. From the sandbox to graduation, bonds are created and some are broken. At times, some friendships were made off of proximity and slowly dissolved once life situations changed while others thrived. I have experienced both, and still do sometimes, but I always knew that the right bonds would always stand the test of time.

We take too much pride in having little to no friends. Your friends double as your community. Now of course I understand the different situations that can cause friendships to end, but they end so the right ones can begin. I know that we've all heard some people say that they don't care to have friends because people are fake, people can't be trusted, and so many other things. Although these things can be true about some people, it should not keep you from creating unbreakable bonds with people who are solid. I've been reading a book called Relational Intelligence by Dr. Dharius Daniels and it speaks about the different kinds of relationships that help you categorize the different people in your life. In this book, it defines what a true friend looks like and the different traits to look for in a true friend. With the help of this book, it has shown me the traits to ALWAYS hold on to when creating bonds with others. The right friends carry the followings traits:

• Unshakable Character

• Unconditional love

• Unbraided Honesty

• Unmovable Reliability

• Unceasing encouragement

1 Corinthians 15:33 says " Bad company corrupts good character" and it holds so much weight. Whether you choose to believe it or not each relationship you have can either push you in the right direction or have you backsliding. The character of a friend is so important to understand so you know to what capacity you can have them in your life. Unconditional Love is something that helps your friendships stand the test of time. A friend that has unconditional love for you is someone that you know will be able to help you face life when you feel like you don't have the strength to do it on your own. Through your worst and your best, their love for you is always consistent.

Honesty, in my opinion, is one of the most important traits you need in a friend because a lot of people look for "yes men". There is no time to hold back the things someone needs to hear the most when it could be the cause of their growth. When you think about it, if a friend can't tell you the truth can you really trust them in any other aspect of your life? If they can't tell you the truth, they're not authentic beloved. If they care, they will tell you the things you need to hear. Reliability or lack there of is what can cause a friendship to dissolve. some have made the mistake of trusting too soon thinking they could rely on someone they called a friend. Because of our own character, we tend to dive head first into some friendships only to find out that certain people aren't as reliable as we thought. When you take a closer look at your circle, you will be able to determine who is reliable. Everybody loves comfort, but that encouragement hits different ! Someone that gives you that extra boost in the midst of uncertainty and reminds you of how far you've come is always a person you should keep close. In a world that tries to make you feel like you're not doing enough, a friend that continues to give you that boost of encouragement and reminder that you are moving in the right direction will always be a keeper.

Because friendships hold so much importance, always take your time to cultivate and pray about them. Sometimes the friendships that you never thought would change, had to because of the growth that needed to take place in you. Don't let the sour experiences with others keep you from opening up to the right community.

Song of the Week: Count On Me by Whitney Houston & CeCe Winans