Behind The Scenes

"Every man has his secret sorrows, which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad" -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Sometimes you eat too much. Sometimes you don't eat enough. Sometimes you can't get out of bed. Your room is a mess, and no matter how great your intentions are to tidy up, you can't get to it. You cry. You snap. Your mind is foggy. Everything is happening at once and you can't seem to grab hold of your thoughts or emotions. You disappear from the social scene and people don't hear from you for a while because you need a moment. Welcome to the world behind depression.

When you don't acknowledge your feelings, they become suppressed. With suppression comes tension. This kind of tension can cause your emotions to spill over like a pot reaching its boiling point. No matter how much you try to sit on your emotions, they will be expressed in various forms. Social withdrawal, irritability, anxiety, and anger are just a few of the ways your emotions can disguise themselves as. What's crazy is there are times where you may not notice things aren't "normal" unitl someone points it out to you. It's because of this that analyzing what's going on internally to understand why you have come to aprroach certain things in a certain way and where they stem from, are important.

For anyone experiencing depression, please understand that isolation can feed the way you feel in some of the worst ways. A wise sister of mine told me something so simple, but so profound: Use that time alone to write down how you feel and seek God's face in the process. I know what some of you may be thinking "People are always telling me to pray pray pray." While I am an advocate for therapy and having a solid community of people that you can turn to in the midst of troubled times, they aren't substitions for communicating with God. They go hand in hand. Sometimes we downplay the importance of communing with God because he doesn't give us that rapid repsonse the way a human would.

For those who have friends or family that are experiencing depression, understand that isolation doesn't signify an issue with you, but an issue internally that they are battling. No text no call doesn't signify a problem with you, but one with understanding that reaching out is an actual option. Remember that life happens to everyone at any given moment. Sometimes reaching out and talking about it isn't the first option that comes to mind because it's hard to explain something you can't make sense of. Sometimes time is needed to gather their thoughts. I encourage everyone to take time to write down their thoughts and analyze how they feel. Don't be afraid to question why you have certain personality traits and what traumas caused them to come into fruition. When you know yourself better, you can devise a plan of action that will help you push through the times that are unbearable. It's only up from here!

Song of the Week: Soul's Anthem (It is well) by Tori Kelly